Single Parenting Stigma

Single-P arnting Families Attached Stigmas The cordial deviance that interests me is atomic number 53 growing, one who chose to get to a child out of wed-lock. The mark attached to existence a wiz erect is rising anew. Many media commentators blame Americas uptrend in violence and other(a) social problems on family breakd birth on maven countermands. This scratch is imbed on myths and stereotypes that pay back been promoted by half-truths and, oft, by prejudiced viewpoints. Many in our society still regard wiz p arenthood as a unwelcome status.I as a single parent myself, I am often admired, moreover at the comparable time looked upon with pity, disgust, sympathy, and perhaps with uneasiness. In defense of single parent families I would argue to de- gradetized single pregnancy by society, in which the shifting of family type in single parent family linehold is now normal and acceptable. One obvious identity is I am a wo earthly concern and my hidden identities are I am a go, unmarried, and parenting alone. A complex of set social and cultural stigma perceived as making a selfish or take decision to chip in a child and raise it on my admit as a unmarried single mother.Growing up I was told by my parents the unwed mothers were bad girls who make mistakes and gotten pregnant, whom family, friends, and the community shamed and reject. There is a clear cultural, moral, and religious message of stigma. In my parents generation, it would highly s firedalous of a single woman raising a child alone and n ever married. In those days it was evaluate for the man to do the honorable thing, and get hitched with the woman who is carrying his child. It did non matter whether he love her or non, having a child out of wedlock is unacceptable and the child would be considered a bastard( child born to unmarried parents).I am a single parent. I never planned on be a single parent. some do. I grew up with an ideal of parenting as something I would do with a husband, within a marriage. Choosing to parent alone was simply non a option in my household growing up. Unwed pregnancy was to be avoided at alone costs Divorce with children was quickly remedied with remarriage. The honored and back up single mothers without stigma is through the death of a husband is a widow. Today, nearly one-third of Ameri place families with children under the age eighteen are in single-parent families, and this has double the number less than two decades ago.Separation and divorce creates some single parent families, that accounts for twice as many single parent families (60%) as failure to marry (30 %), while the death of a parent creates less than (7 %) of such families. Single parent families are raised by single mothers are becoming the majority family type culturally in United States. However, there is still a powerful negative images associated with blacken single mothers and rarely does the superior culture identify individuals, but s ooner stigmatized the entire class of down in the mouth mothers.Many presume the color of the typical eudaimonia recipient is a Black mother and that is not entirely true, but Black mothers are disproportionately represented. I personally arse not explain why single parent never been married families are far more prevalent in the Black communities than in the white communities. Marriage is the most common for all women and for most women the only steering out of poverty. For Black women, however the economic gain of marriage is often few and far between due to the poor economic opportunities of Black men.Although, I am a single mother raising triplet sons. My children shake off not and bequeath not suffer from the outcome of poverty, dewy-eyed because I am a single parent. I am not poor. I am gainfully employed and I own my own home for the last fifteen years. There is a strong stigma attached to single mothers households are living below the poverty line. What are the crit ics saying about the single mothers? Stigmatizing the single parent families as die of the underclass, broken, and deviant. Their children are mostly to have emotional or behavioral problems.To have children out of wedlock, are more likely to have trouble in school, and likely to commit crimes. Therefore, because I chose to raise my children alonesociety blames me for the decomposition in social order. The two parent families is still compared as the handed-down family formation and contribute to a healthy and prospering society. I of late saw on TV an interview with Ann Coulter on the verbalize show The View . she blames many of societys problems on single moms. She goes on to say that our jails are filled with the offspring of single moms.To commit single moms of universe responsible for all societys problems is perfectly crazy. There are many reasons relationships end, and when there are kids involved commonly the bulk if not all of the certificate of indebtedness of raising the kids is assumed by the mom. We single moms should be applauded and not attacked for this. Sure, there are some women that answer to have a baby on their own with no man in the picture, but thunder mug you blame them?It is hard to find a decent man who also wants to raise a family. Even when you do there are no guarantees he will stick around for the long haul. Nevertheless, single fathers have biological link or court-ordered status as a non-custodial parent. What that actually means is they are expected to pay child support for their children, but rarely do they have sole or joint custody of their children. Some men have this immature concept of fathering that expects men to separate from their children and their responsibility, if they do not go along a connection to the childrens mother.There is a layer of stigma that is determined upon Black single mothers complete with highly fertile capacity( having many babies), being lazy and shiftless, and being in a relat ionship with uncaring and e very(prenominal) bit lazy black man. In which he is not willing to work, will not marry her, and will not support his family. This stereotype does not fit all single African American mothers and fathers. Unfortunately, those are the views of the dominant culture in our society of unwed African American single mothers. There are confronting stigmas and myths of single parenting as society continues to view that stigma as appropriate and justified.The premier, single-parent families are poor and single parenting causes poverty and social problems. Second, single-parent families are physiologically unhealthy. Third, single-parent families are immoral. The religious standpoint the families are distasteful because they lack the blessing and validation of marriage through the church. Finally, there is a underlying undertone of stigma attached to race and gender beliefs that get along support the badge of social scorn and economic hardships. What I fuck abou t single mothers is far divergent from the myths that are circulating in society, resulting in powerful stigmatizing.The truth and reality is many single mother are raising their children very successful alone, including myself. Parenting is the hardest job, that one will ever have. However, single parenting is even harder, but not impossible to be successful in providing for your family. Society must look at the parent and not the circumstances that lead to their being a single mom or dad. The first priority and full responsibility is towards the child, put the child first in every and all decisions. My personal story is I have always been there for my three sons and it is my job to take care of them, until they can take care of themselves.I have raised boys to men and at the old to be gentleman. In my household it is filled with love and support. Education was always instilled and valued in my home. My sons are very intelligent, respectful, good human beings and all because I t ook full responsibility for them and I took parenting very seriously. I can argue strongly that children need love, discipline, structured, boundaries, and guidance. Children who lack these exposures will perhaps pose menace to society, but not from living in a single parent household. Two parent families can be dysfunctional, dont place the blame solely on single parent families.The house with white picket fence is only a disguise, one can only guess what is truly going on behind unlikable doors. For the love that I had for my sons father and yes, they have the same dad (a myth that African American single mothers children have different fathers). We drifted apart and we decided to separate and I focus on being a mom. In neither case was it my choice to be a SINGLE mom my choice was to just be a MOM. unforgiving to report that single mom bashing is postcode new. And, the double standard is nothing new, either.Single dad who pays his child support and see his kids on a regular( a) basis is a hero Single moms, on the other hand, wait to be held to nearly impossible standards. I can only provoke what has worked for me. I hold my head high, keep my decisions grounded in whats best for my sons , and ignore the small minded people. My sons are my blessings, they are beautiful, and I am very proud to be their mother. Being a single mom presents additive and unique challenges and experiences. I feel I can conquer the world, because being a mom is the toughest job there is.Life is never boring These myths and stigmas can be confronted successfully and new strength can be found in the truth. As with so many aspects of single parenting, myself and other mothers rise to the challenge and become better people because of it. The myths are sometimes perspicacious and subconscious, but the more we examine them, the more clearly we take responsibility for our lives and the lives of our children. My deepest love and appreciation goes to my sons, who have taught me more than they will ever know. I love you.. higher than the moon, wider than the sky.